You probably think I may be crazy for saying that. Just think of all the times you won something. You weren't sure why or perhaps you felt like you didn't deserve it. Maybe you didn't try as hard as the other times when you lost? Then, that's when it hits you that perhaps losing is more important than winning. If winning is what you expect to do don't you think you might grow more from losing? Losing is winning if you're obsessed with keeping score.
I think of all the times that I've tried something and was repeatedly defeated and honestly, I don't know why I got back up again. Perhaps, I felt I hadn't caught the dream i thought i was so close to catching. And thinking back, had I won, I know I would have stopped trying again to win a title, goal or feat. I would have crossed it off my list and moved onto something else if it was that simple. In hindsight, I realize I've been more concerned with completing a task than actually doing it right. I will admit that. Alot of times, I'd rather just get something over with than really putting my heart into it. I like feeling that I accomplished something I thought I never would and then putting my heart into it the next round. Baby steps, baby steps...
Listen to the Silence, Not the Noise
Its interesting what happens when you let the silence of life consume you. Your life's truths seem to come to the surface. When you thought you were looking, observing, and watching you weren't doing the most important thing-- seeing. When you thought you were listening or learning you weren't hearing. And when you felt that you were doing, accomplishing or finishing something you were never really putting your heart into it. But, when you are still, all the things you were avoiding come to the surface. It doesn't matter how hard you try to bury them in the busy-ness of your life, in the silence, all the things you are afraid of come to the surface. Be still, the boldest truths come out in the silence. I think one of the worst things in the world is for someone to be afraid of being alone with themselves. You live in your body, how are you going to be afraid of having a conscious relationship with yourself. I think its the most important thing, right next to having one with God. Good grief, He made you for a reason. Might as well spend some time actually trying to figure out what it is by yourself.
The Underdog
When I think of two-sides of anything I think of the underrepresented side. Who's going to battle for them? And most times, I'm biologically on that side anyway!! When I think of a large group who aren't praised much, I think of introverts. If you're an introvert would you say so in an interview? If you are one, but wouldn't say thats who you are, why? And if you are one and would, why would you? Introverts must be the most understated and misunderstood people. I usually hear the term "introvert" when someone is describing someone as being 'anti-social'. In their defense, I would describe an introvert to be the following: someone who is less social with others, that in their time with themselves, develop a genuine sincerity to their thoughts, opinions and their beliefs truly become their own. They are less concerned with how others will think of them and more concerned with how they think of themselves and don't mind at all if they are standing alone. Being with themself and by themself is just as important or more important than being with others.
When you spend time with yourself, the most allegiance you will have will be to yourself. And when you do, you truly become your own best friend. That's why they are understated. Their survival, happiness or contentment doesn't depend on the support of others the way that many extroverts generally need the company of others. Introverts seem to have more comfortably found the security within themselves! (And in today's world, it might be a smart move!) I think its worth stating for an understated people. Yes, some of them truly are. Secure. There is nothing wrong with being an introvert because first of all its a label. And secondly, labels stem from someone's opinion on describing a group of people. If I'm a true individual there won't be books written about me. No one will be able to figure me out unless they talk to me....often. And if an introvert is someone who prefers to keep to themselves while listening, observing and being silent instead of talking to others all the time, don't you think they would gather a rather significant amount of information in their silence? And perhaps, more so than the person who is busy talking all the time?? When you speak, you're not hearing anything! And if you're expelling words, when are you receiving them? This is one of those times when perhaps its better to receive than give. If you're giving more speech than hearing it perhaps you have more to learn. "Just a thought, not a sermon!"
When you spend time with yourself, the most allegiance you will have will be to yourself. And when you do, you truly become your own best friend. That's why they are understated. Their survival, happiness or contentment doesn't depend on the support of others the way that many extroverts generally need the company of others. Introverts seem to have more comfortably found the security within themselves! (And in today's world, it might be a smart move!) I think its worth stating for an understated people. Yes, some of them truly are. Secure. There is nothing wrong with being an introvert because first of all its a label. And secondly, labels stem from someone's opinion on describing a group of people. If I'm a true individual there won't be books written about me. No one will be able to figure me out unless they talk to me....often. And if an introvert is someone who prefers to keep to themselves while listening, observing and being silent instead of talking to others all the time, don't you think they would gather a rather significant amount of information in their silence? And perhaps, more so than the person who is busy talking all the time?? When you speak, you're not hearing anything! And if you're expelling words, when are you receiving them? This is one of those times when perhaps its better to receive than give. If you're giving more speech than hearing it perhaps you have more to learn. "Just a thought, not a sermon!"
All Sides of the Story
I think the reason why some people feel lost of "empty" (as many Alpha males and females describe) or can't just stop and do nothing for a day or two is because they are afraid to. They are afraid that if they do, life-- their life might become too real for them to handle seeing what is really going on in it. They may be afraid to stop and be still, in looking at the person in the mirror staring back at them. Its a frightening vision when you actually stare at yourself in the mirror. All of a sudden your faults, beauties, shortcomings, inadequacies, strengths, power, potential, insecurities, purpose...who you really are in the busy-ness of your life seems to stare back at you. You're losing touch with the spiritual you. Because you don't take time to nurture it. That's why I think some of us can't stand to be still and do nothing. We're afraid that the problems that we need to devote time into thinking more deeply about will eat us alive to the point where we are depressed and empty. Its okay to feel those ways. Feel that way, dwell in it for a minute. Get it out of your system and figure out how to become your best friend so that doesn't happen. But, for the next time it does be okay with being alone by yourself in the emptiness that may be boredom begot by disconnectedness. Feel bad for yourself, let it go and feel good about learning something new. Exercise your mind.
Deal with it, work it out, then let it go.
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